Your baby has finally arrived, and this wrinkly little being will soon take centre stage as family and friends coo over him. But how do you feel? All mothers react differently to the birth of their child and there are no right or wrong ways of how to feel. Some mothers react with immediate feelings of love, while for others, the bonding process take longer. Some women need time to recover from labour, while others feel scared at the realisation that this tiny baby is entrusted into their care.
Whatever you feel, you can be sure that you are not alone with these emotions. These first weeks will be full of new and exciting changes as you and your baby get to know each other.
Getting through the first week
Coming home with a new baby will mean huge changes, particularly for firsttime parents. The mother may have already felt a little daunted at the realisation of just how much care the baby needs from her experience in hospital, while her partner may still be on the high of having a new baby, only to realise the demands of parenthood in the days following.
Accept that changes are inevitable and that you will basically need to be on call 24 hours a day for your newborn. The first week will be particularly demanding and exhausting. Not only will there be little time for you to recover from labour or to deal with any doubts and fears you may have of motherhood, you will also have to adjust quickly and get on with the tasks of caring for your baby.
To make it easier, prepare for your homecoming before you go into hospital. Stock up on food for when you return from hospital. Shop online and buy in bulk a variety of frozen and energy-boosting foods. You can try www.parknshop.com or www.wellcomehk.com for home deliveries.
When you announce the birth to family and friends, you can let them know if you prefer them to visit at a later date when you are more organized. You could also record a message on your answer machine or send out e-mail notifications.
In Chinese families, it is traditional for the mother or mother-in-law to help the new mother. If you are an expat and do not have family in Hong Kong, there are midwives or nurses available to live in with new mothers or provide postnatal home visits. Having someone around who is experienced with baby care will help enormously to ease stress and anxiety. As your confidence grows, life after the first week becomes much easier. However, if the situation does not improve, talk to your doctor, midwives or clinic nurse.
Nappies
Changing a baby's nappy is often a subject of worry for first-time parents before the arrival. Rest assured, by the end of your first day with your baby, you will have changed him at least 10 times!
Nappies come in three main forms; disposable, re-usable and traditional cloth nappies. Despite the fact that they take hundreds of years to biodegrade, their convenience has led to the majority of Hong Kong mothers choosing disposable nappies.
As well as the major international-brand nappies, there are Asian-brand nappies, such as Pet Pet (roughly translated, this is Chinese for bottom!) and Fitti, to name but two.
Experiment to see which design of disposable nappy is best for your baby by buying the smallest quantity when trying a brand. When you know which you prefer, you could order in bulk using the supermarket delivery service.
Re-usable nappies, consisting of nappies with waterproof pants that can be washed, are the compromise between convenience and being environmentally conscious. One such nappy is the Weenie nappy system which consists of waterproof (non-plastic) pants that are used with disposable pads made from managed forests. Weenies come supplied with nappy bags that biodegrade in three months. They are available from Tots Trading, tel: 2869 7922.
Another washable nappy system is Kooshies, a Canadian brand, which consists of waterproof cotton pants and pre-folded nappies (for stockists, contact Meridian, tel: 2328 2662). The Kooshies pull-on training pants have been rated best for potty training by Hong Kong's Parents magazine.
Traditional towelling or terry nappies are the choice of environmentally-aware mothers, however their main disadvantage is that they do require a lot more effort to use. In Hong Kong, their inconvenience is magnified because of the difficulties of presoaking, washing and drying them if you do not have the washing facilities.
To clean cloth nappies, soak soiled nappies in a plastic bucket with a lid and some sterilising fluid or half a cup of vinegar, then use a mild washing powder, rinsing nappies twice to get rid of any detergent that might irritate your baby's skin. Fabric softener should be avoided as it can irritate young skin.
If you do want to try towelling nappies, they are available in most department stores or you can buy pre-folded nappies at Mothercare. It might be an idea to use towelling nappies for your newborn and then switch when your baby gets older and starts moving around more.
Changing tips
Care of the delicate skin around the nappy area is very important to prevent nappy rash which can be very painful to your baby. Nappy rash is particularly common in HK due to the hot climate.
Change your baby's nappy as soon as he needs it and more frequently if the weather is hot as a sweat-soaked nappy can irritate delicate skin as much as a soiled one. Avoid using plastic pants.
When you are at home, always use warm water and cotton wool to clean your baby's bottom, to minimise irritation. Baby wipes can be kept for outings. Always clean from front to back to avoid infection. Only clean the bits you can see, that is, do not pull back a boy's foreskin or girl's labia. Be sure to pat your baby's bottom dry, in particular between the creases. If you wish to use a barrier cream, always use it sparingly.
To prevent chafing, make sure that the nappy is not too tight. You should allow a finger's width between the nappy and your baby's stomach.
In the first few weeks, your baby might not like to go without his nappy. However, as soon as he is comfortable with having the nappy removed, allow him some 'nappyfree' time. Letting the air circulate is the best way of preventing nappy rash. Put the changing mat on the floor, cover it with a towel and take this opportunity to encourage your baby to kick and play!
If your baby does develop nappy rash, try all of the above steps. If there is no improvement, seek medical advice as nappy rash can sometimes be complicated by an infection.
Safe sleeping
Every new parent is concerned about the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), or cot death as it is more commonly known. This is the sudden and unexpected death of a baby. Most victims are usually between 3-6 months of age with boys being more susceptible. However, cot death is a rarer occurrence in Hong Kong than it is in Europe and North America.
Much research has been conducted into the cause of this tragic syndrome, but while there are many theories, the exact cause remains elusive. There are international guidelines that have been proven to reduce the risk of cot death and it is important that you, your helper or anyone who is involved in the care of your child follow these simple steps.
Always place your baby on his back to sleep as the risk of cot death is nine times greater if a baby sleeps on his tummy. This is a relatively new practice and not what was done 10 to 15 years ago, therefore you may need to educate grandparents and helpers about this. Most grandparents will express concern that the baby will choke if put to sleep on their back. Reassure them that there is no evidence that sleeping on his back increases the risk of choking. The baby should also be placed in a feet-to-foot position. This means the baby's feet are at the foot of the cot and so he baby cannot slip down under the blankets.
Remove all toys when you place your baby in the cot to sleep. Remove cot mobiles once the baby can push up on his hands and feet. There should be nothing in the cot other than the sheet on which your baby sleeps, a firm mattress and any blankets that are needed. Always use blankets that have tiny holes, which are specifically designed for babies and do make sure that you adjust the number of blankets according to the weather. Do not expectant parents do, and buy bumpers, quilts and pillows before the arrival of your baby. These should only be used when the baby is over one year old.
Ideally, the room temperature should be around 20℃. Invest in a pair of blackout curtains or blinds for the baby's room to keep out the strong tropical sun and to help keep the room cooler. Do not place the cot under the air conditioner or in the direct line of a fan.
By feeling a baby's tummy, you can tell if the baby's too hot or cold. As limbs are always cooler, feeling a baby's hands or feet to estimate temperature will give you an inaccurate estimation.
During the summer, make sure your baby's head is uncovered when indoors. Most body heat is lost through the head and, as babies cannot regulate their temperature as well as adults, by keeping the head covered you are taking away a defence mechanism by which babies can cool down.
Never sleep on the sofa with your baby, or share a bed with your baby if you or your partner smokes, have taken alcohol or drugs that cause drowsiness. Try not to let anyone smoke in the same room as your baby and avoid taking your baby to smoky places.
Seek prompt medical attention if your baby has a raised temperature and appears listless and less responsive, or has difficulty breathing. Always seek medical attention if there are any signs of illness in a baby of less than four months old.
Birth registration
One of the first steps in your child's 'official' life is the registration of his birth. Even if you have decided your baby's name a long time ago and want to get the registration out of the way, it is advisable to wait at least two weeks after the birth to allow enough time for the birth records to reach the registry from the hospital. The birth registration must be done at the registry of the district in which the birth took place. Your hospital will provide you with information of which registry you should attend. The list below shows details of the birth registries and the districts served.
The Births & Deaths General Register Office
3/F, Low Block, Queensway Government Offices, 66 Queensway, Admiralty
Tel: 2867 2785
Districts served: Hong Kong Island (including Canossa Hospital, Matilda Hospital, Queen Mary Hospital, Hong Kong Adventist Hospital, Hong Kong Sanatorium & Hospital, St Paul's Hospital, Pamela Youde Nethersole Eastern Hospital and outlying islands.
Kowloon Births Registry
M/Floor, Yau Ma Tei Carpark Building, 250 Shanghai Street, Yau Ma Tei
Tel: 2359 4485
Disrict served: Kowloon and Tsuen Wan districts (including St Teresa Hospital, Kwong Wah Hospital, Queen Elizabeth Hospital, United Christian Hospital, Baptist Hospital, Princess Margaret Hospital and Tsuen Wan Adventist Hospital).
Tuen Mun District Births Registry
1st Floor, Tuen Mun Government Offices, 1 Tuen Hi Road, Tuen Mun
Tel: 2451 3005
District served: Tuen Mun and Yuen Long districts (including Tuen Mun Hospital).
Sha Tin District Births Registry
3rd Floor, Sha Tin Government Offices,
No. 1, Sheung Wo Che Road,
Sha Tin, New Territories
Tel: 2695 1175
Districts served: Sha Tin, Tai Po, Fanling and Sheung Shui districts (including Prince of Wales Hospital, Shatin International Medical Centre Union Hospital, Alice Ho Miu Ling Nethersole Hospital).
The Births and Deaths General Register Office also operates three mobile registries at Cheung Chau, Sai Kung and Tai O.
For the registration, only one parent needs to be present and your baby need not attend. You will need to take along your marriage certificate and the HKID cards of you and your partner.
If you do not have HKID, then you need to take along identity cards from your country of origin and travel documents, such as passports, documents of identity, etc. The original documents are needed, although you also need to take photocopies if you have 'settled' status in Hong Kong.
If you and your partner are not married, then a statutory declaration (or a certified copy of the relevant court order) may be required from either you or your partner to confirm your baby's paternity.
After registering your baby's birth, it is advisable to obtain a certified copy of the birth certificate as it will be needed for all sorts of official purposes. Most parents buy several copies as obtaining copies at a later date may incur a search fee.
There is no charge for birth registrations carried out within 42 days of the birth. Registrations after this deadline but within 12 months cost $140. Post-registration of the birth after one year costs $680 and requires the permission of the Registrar of Births and Deaths. Each certified copy of the birth certificate costs $140. For more information, visit the Immigration Department website at info.gov.hk/immd/
Passports & visas
To obtain a passport for your baby, you must have a copy of the birth certificate before you apply.
It may be helpful if you pick up the necessary paperwork from the Immigration Department, embassy or consulate before the birth to save you time afterwards.
If you are an expat, your newborn also needs a visa to remain in Hong Kong. Your employer will be able to arrange this.
When taking a passport photo of your newborn make sure that he is lying on the required coloured background. You can do this at home and then have it developed to the required size or have your baby's picture taken by a professional.
(Extracted from Matilda International Hospital, B is for Baby for Matilda International Hospital)
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